Feelings

Is life so wretched? Isn't it rather your hands which are too small, your vision which is muddled? You are the one who must grow up..

Feelings are so random, I mean we wish we can categorize it but sometimes it’s just not possible to express what we are feeling. I usually write about a certain aspect of my life but today I’m just going to ramble. When you’re attached to someone in such a way that life seems to be at a standstill when they come in front of you. When the sight of that person is no less than a drug, it’s a moment that deems time motionless and where moments feel like ages. It’s than one moment that changes the way you feel for the rest of your day. Only problem is that how do express such feelings?

Well in my case I don’t, the person who these feelings are for well doesn’t understand the extent of my feelings for her. My existence in her life seems optional, her existence in mine is imperative, my fear, my sadness, the extent of my hurt is all hidden. No one will know. I’d really like to know an upside to all this, but really I can’t find one. Patience is a virtue yeah right... I have to hand her over with my very hands to those people who are better than me and well may well loose her to them. But then we forget I made the mistake, I’m going to have to suffer for it. I really thought work would get my mind of stuff but it just makes work more difficult.

She always felt I didn’t do enough, but how do I explain to her that there is no point in bringing gold to a goldmine or find something beautiful for some who is the epitome of beauty. Well I am inadequate, in many ways, but I know very well how to reach my goals. What’s the fun in learning from others mistake when u can make them yourself and learn? I guess I’m learning to handle my immature feelings more constructively. Now I’m blank.............