Sunday, December 27, 2009


There are hundreds of ways to kneel and kiss the ground.Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and right doing,there is a field. I'll meet you there.

The sad thing about life is you are always at the receiving end when you try to do well. I mean seriously, just because someone is nice to you, doesn’t mean u have to push it to the limits. I mean am I obligated to take the moral path every time? Or am I the only person on the face of this earth that makes mistakes. To be honest morality is over rated our emotions are in charge of the much hyped temple of morality and moral reasoning is a mere servant masquerading as a high priest. Reason has absolutely no role to play in our moral behavior, Evolution does that.

So what we do what we say is a manifestation of ourself. I hope to explore not only myself but an attempt as futile as it may be try to make “you” understand what I am all about. The first part would be “The Regretful Self” this is usually followed by the Commanding self. Initially I was unaware and unconscious, as the light of faith grew, insight dawns for the first time, the negative tendency of habitually self-centered approach to the world and everyone is apparent to the regretful self. At this level, wants and desires still dominate, but now the person repents from time to time and tries to follow higher impulses. I think there is a battle between me and my soul, it will continue and I don’t know who will educate whom, who will become the master. Will I be the person who accepts truth or deny it?

I apologized more than once, I convinced you. I never left u naked out in the rain, I gave you protection and care whenever you asked me. What I did was definitely wrong, but I had valid reasons if I don’t like something I let go. I should have spoken to you about my problems? I don’t do that. You can’t force me, nor can you accept your mistake, so again this is a dead end. I wasn’t doing anyone a favor, I was just satisfying my needs to make up for what I did. I may have left you, but look again I am still there. A sad end, but an end nonetheless, you mistake you’ve crucified yourself between two thieves like me- regrets for the past and fear of the future. Now You are Stranded.
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