Binary Thinking

“Einstein said that if quantum mechanics were correct then the world would be crazy. Einstein was right - the world is crazy.” 
― Daniel M. Greenberger

In a world of possibilities, we restrict ourselves to  and/or. It doesn't always have to be like that.  Seasons change, people come and go, and the only thing constant is you. Change is never always for the best, but sometimes when you realize it; it's too late to go back. You can be both dead and alive until you realize it (Schrödinger's cat). 

I envy people; not for the fame or fortune but for the clarity they have on the direction they have in life. It is easy to set low targets, achieve them and go with the flow, but as time passes ruthlessly, in reality, each day and every moment seems to drag on till eternity in my head. This state of ambiguity tears me from the inside daily. The world of possibility is out there, but we are stuck in the confinement of our mind. We at times fail to realize that much of our life is in our own hands, there is a world inside that needs to be explored.  

As life progresses the urge for certainty grows stronger. But as the Heisenberg uncertainty principle states that it is impossible to know simultaneously the exact position and momentum of a particle which kind of sounds exactly like my life. Not really sure if quantum mechanics was the topic I wanted to discuss, but it's a start of a journey to examine life as we know it. 

Devachan

Some days are better than others, yesterday was pathetic. It’s easy when the trigger is someone else, you can play the blame game, but when the problem is internal it’s hard to ignore, for someone who meticulously plans out his day, week and till the end of times, such a situation just magnifies the OCD compulsions, which sends you reeling down a circular path of destruction.  I don’t really write self help blogs, and this one isn’t the run-of-the-mill self help blog, but I use the following points to judge how far I’ve progressed on the path of destruction.  

(This blog is inspired by an article by Rachel Gillet http://www.entrepreneur.com/article/247295)

1. Time Management :  I think I have this down apart from the crippling feeling of  not being able to do things.
2. Empathy: I can pretend, but im not sure if I will ever be able to do it genuinely.
3. Mastering your sleep: 8 hours enough said
4. Positive Self Talk: I hate it but I try
5. Consistency: where there is OCD, there is consistency
6. Asking for help: I will eventually ask after all is lost
7. Knowing when to shut up and actually doing it: this is something I need to learn
8. Listening : what did you say ?
9. Minding your own business: helps to filter the most important things in life. I bet everyone has their own set of problems, if you don’t, get in touch with me
10. Mastering your thoughts: one step at a time. 

Life is never as simple as listing ideas as pointers,  and I quote Limp Bizkit here “ life’s a lesson, you learn it when your through.”

Ipotane

Some days are easier than others while on others you feel like you have been placed in the epicenter if a tornado.  When you take the decision to set sail on a journey you often hope for a calm sea, and rarely prepare for a storm.  One of the cruel facts of life is that people will use you and leave you hanging once your worth and diminished. But it’s a part of life I guess, one thing that has never worried me is someone’s progress, and I’m happy that people are eventually moving on.  What bothers me is that people believe for religion and life that intentions will be their redemption.

Words and nothing if not backed up by action. Words distract you but you never forget experiences. And life is nothing but a compilation of experiences that make you what you are. In my case a very bitter person.

I have never bothered about what has happened on the outside, my shortcomings, and my fears. I hate you for destroying my insides. My existence and my livelihood, but you’re not the first and I doubt you will be the last to attack my wall of integrity. I will build up myself from the ruins with foundations that cannot be shaken. Like the phoenix, I will rise from the ashes of my weaker self.

Lessons / Public Service Announcement

Buddha said, "It doesn't matter how long you forget, only how soon you remember!"

Well another year full of regrets should be ending now, or so you would think. I should be making resolutions to keep myself away from all the drama and nuisances which send me into a psychological whirlwind, but I won’t. I’ve come to accept all of my flaws as an integral part of me. I’d like to call it “The Persuasion of Roydon D’mello”, if you have had the opportunity to experience this order of life consider yourself truly blessed.

Well the world has, people like them and people like I. I make one mistake and I think I have to pay for it for the rest of my life and other kind just need to have one convincing conversation for everyone to get on their side. Love, money, lust is what makes the world go round I tell you. I’m proud of each and every mistake I made, why ?!! Well at least I made them in sound mind (in essence) and take full responsibility and not just blame it on booze or any other recreational drugs to speak of. I was young once, I thought smoking helped release your tension, and we all know how stupid that is. If a Rs. 100 pack of cigarette could solve problems Mother Theresa would just hand out packs instead of doing all that she did.

These people should join politics, I mean not because they are going to do wonders for this country (that ship has sailed a while ago) but because they fit the profile. Firstly, no matter what they do how they act they still are popular, with loyal subjects advocating their innocence with great zeal, does not matter how much they drink, or how many people they want to beat up and lastly they least important they education level. The general rule is that one bad apple spoils the lot, in our society the lot was born spoilt; the good apples well need to be saved. How that’s going to be done, I have no idea. Its starts with one cigarette and one drink and goes on to spoil families. I may come across as a man with a lot of hatred, but I seriously love mankind, actually more womankind but that’s an issue I’ll discuss some other time. My advice for the people who indulge in such activities and for the people who support them RECYCLE!!!!! I’m not your MOM so do whatever you want but keep the city CLEAN. :) :) :) :)

Change

Sometimes reality has a way of sneaking up and biting us in the ass. And when the dam bursts, all you can do is swim. The world of pretend is a cage, not a cocoon. We can only lie to ourselves for so long. We are tired; we are scared, denying it doesn't change the truth. Sooner or later we have to put aside our denial and face the world. Head on, guns blazing. De Nile. It's not just a river in Egypt, it's a freakin' ocean. So how do you keep from drowning in it?- Grey

We live in a culture that encourages us not to take our own suffering seriously, but rather to make light of it or even to laugh about it. What is more, this attitude is regarded as a virtue, and many people are proud of their lack of sensitivity toward their own fate and particularly toward their fate as a child. Each human being is born as something new, something that never existed before. Each is born with the capacity to win at life. Each person has a unique way of seeing, hearing, touching, tasting, and thinking. Each has his or her own unique potentials – capabilities and limitations. Each can be a significant, thinking, aware, and creative being. We are what we are, I understand that change is an integral part of life, but shouldn’t change be something that’s brings in realization and not be forced down your throat?
I have a hard time accepting what is inevitable in life, something that we humans have to face on a consistent level. Change. This blog post has nothing to do with President Zardari, nor anything that has to do with politics, but what it does have to do with is normal personal changes in life that occur on what seems to be on a regular basis; Disappointment in life, losing a loved one, moving, losing friends, finishing goals and accomplishments. Changes seem to happen when we least expect it, and there are times when we do see the change coming and have time to prepare, though it is still hard sometimes. The hardest ones are when they happen out of the blue, and we don’t even see them coming. They have a way of putting us back in check of reality. It is scary sometimes, because this can cause us to be caught off guard and make us feel insecure. At least that is how I have felt before…

I hate people who pretend to be your support system, who have bonded with you knowing your faults and weaknesses, people who have some power over you, like elders you respect constantly trying to change you for their benefit, so that you may fit into their lifestyle and restore equilibrium to their environment disturbing yours in the process. Nobody has ever been successful in changing people, or manipulating others to their advantage. All these naive schemes backfire and fail causing big damage in the end. I couldn’t take it, why should I change and lose my identity; become someone I’m not, why should I compromise on my greatness. If the basis of change is justified who am I to argue. But for those who feel that changing other is a means of bringing about good, think again. Change yourself and practice what you preach.

I really hate people who give a *beep*, I was that person, about the opinions of other people. I'm going to be quite honest here, I'm not talking about caring if people think you smell bad, that's a given. You should smell decent, if not for anyone else, than for yourself. I'm not talking about people who care what people think of their achievements. You should be proud of your accomplishments. I'm not talking about people who care about what their friends think of their dirty little secrets.

No, I'm going to be frank. I hate people who will read this, think I'm talking about them, and get offended. I hate people who won't say what they want to say because, for whatever reason, the opinion of someone you're never going to have a second chatter with is... important?