Devachan

Some days are better than others, yesterday was pathetic. It’s easy when the trigger is someone else, you can play the blame game, but when the problem is internal it’s hard to ignore, for someone who meticulously plans out his day, week and till the end of times, such a situation just magnifies the OCD compulsions, which sends you reeling down a circular path of destruction.  I don’t really write self help blogs, and this one isn’t the run-of-the-mill self help blog, but I use the following points to judge how far I’ve progressed on the path of destruction.  

(This blog is inspired by an article by Rachel Gillet http://www.entrepreneur.com/article/247295)

1. Time Management :  I think I have this down apart from the crippling feeling of  not being able to do things.
2. Empathy: I can pretend, but im not sure if I will ever be able to do it genuinely.
3. Mastering your sleep: 8 hours enough said
4. Positive Self Talk: I hate it but I try
5. Consistency: where there is OCD, there is consistency
6. Asking for help: I will eventually ask after all is lost
7. Knowing when to shut up and actually doing it: this is something I need to learn
8. Listening : what did you say ?
9. Minding your own business: helps to filter the most important things in life. I bet everyone has their own set of problems, if you don’t, get in touch with me
10. Mastering your thoughts: one step at a time. 

Life is never as simple as listing ideas as pointers,  and I quote Limp Bizkit here “ life’s a lesson, you learn it when your through.”

The Veiled Sphinx

It feels like one of those days when things are just not going your way, the problem is that I have had those days every day for the past year or so. It feels like everyone is out to get you, but obviously that isn’t true since you aren’t that special. I always thought I was right, but 30 years into existence you realize everything was a lie. This might even be a midlife crisis, but the line is thin, and time is short.

Many people struggle with finding their purpose in life; it’s more common than you think. The chances are you are probably living someone else’s life or fulfilling someone’s wishes other than your own. When people lose hope, they put their trust in things which are nothing but self fulfilling prophecies like the Greek drama Oedipus Rex thus the theory Oedipal Complex.

If you are dealing with some sort of mental illness, be assured you will have to do it alone. I might seem idle, but in reality I’m really busy in my head. People would generally advise you to cheer up or stay positive. But in reality the positivism is just to mask those actions that have done others wrong. Just because you have justified it in your head doesn’t mean its right. The worth you have assigned to others is usually the incompetence you are trying to hide yourself. But hey, whatever works right.

Giving charity from robbing the right of others hardly seems fair, morality doesn’t come from religion but from within. The simple lessons I’ve learnt in life is, money isn’t everything (but usually the cause of stress and anxiety) and it's okay to have some fun once in a while. 

Ipotane

Some days are easier than others while on others you feel like you have been placed in the epicenter if a tornado.  When you take the decision to set sail on a journey you often hope for a calm sea, and rarely prepare for a storm.  One of the cruel facts of life is that people will use you and leave you hanging once your worth and diminished. But it’s a part of life I guess, one thing that has never worried me is someone’s progress, and I’m happy that people are eventually moving on.  What bothers me is that people believe for religion and life that intentions will be their redemption.

Words and nothing if not backed up by action. Words distract you but you never forget experiences. And life is nothing but a compilation of experiences that make you what you are. In my case a very bitter person.

I have never bothered about what has happened on the outside, my shortcomings, and my fears. I hate you for destroying my insides. My existence and my livelihood, but you’re not the first and I doubt you will be the last to attack my wall of integrity. I will build up myself from the ruins with foundations that cannot be shaken. Like the phoenix, I will rise from the ashes of my weaker self.

Biocenosis

We usually tend to look for big signs; we expect the mystery of life to be communicated in grandeur. And it’s because of this expectation we miss out the subtle signs which describe the magnificence yet simplicity of the gifts life has to offer.


1) Timing: the seasons teach us that there is a time for everything, what goes around, comes around, it teaches us patients. The good things in life come from self discovery, meditation and contemplation with time and not like instant coffee.

2) Humility: the trees shed their leaves every autumn only to gain their supremacy back in spring, every fall has a rise, there is nothing that you cannot come back from, staying humble to your roots may not get you to the top quickly but it will when the time is right.

3) There is peace in chaos: reconnect with nature through your five senses and you will realize its contradictions it's simple and complicated, orderly and messy, quiet and busy. And once you can associate with this, you harness an internal force that helps you achieve peace in the midst of chaos. This happens when you realize your world is bigger than just your problems.

Watching the darkness of the night transform into light injects a burst of hope to get up every morning. We tend to limit our lives with fear, anger, ill health basically self imposed barriers. The leaf transforms the invisible energy of the sun to nourish itself; you can use this invisible energy to turn around your life as well.